Coming Out to Ourselves
Admitting, Accepting and Embracing Who We Truly Are
About the Book
“With the words, ‘… there is no such thing as those people. There is only us,’ Jerry Troyer welcomes everyone who has struggled, and really everyone who reads this book, to truly love and take care of themselves.”
—Anthony Bidulka, Lambda Award-winning novelist and author of the Russell Quant detective series
Have you ever wondered why? Why can you lose weight, but not keep it off? Why can’t you seem to stay clean and sober? Why do your relationships all end the same way—badly? Why do you keep buying things that wind up not making you happy?
The cause of self-defeating behaviors can often be shame—from our sexual orientation; an event we’ve experienced, such as getting pregnant before marriage; a messy divorce; a job loss; or being abused as a child. Frequently, it has to do with what somebody told us when we were growing up, and we accepted whatever it was they said as our truth.
But where did we get the idea that it is wrong to be gay? Who said we had to get married before having a baby? Whose rule is it that we should be ashamed if a marriage doesn’t last forever?
Aren’t you tired of being on the roller coaster of fat and thin, clean and using? Coming Out to Ourselves: Admitting, Accepting, and Embracing Who We Truly Are invites you to go on a journey into your heart, where you can heal, forgive, and truly come out to yourself.
Gay or straight, male or female, religious or agnostic, many of us carry guilt, shame, and fear that someone will find out our deepest and darkest secrets. Our secrets can often make us physically ill, in lack and struggle, going from one hurtful and unloving relationship to another, and separated from our heart center. Regardless of what it is that’s causing us to feel guilty, ashamed, or afraid, if it’s keeping us out of peace, there has never been a better time than right now to look at it, forgive it, and release it.
This can be the most important journey you will ever take.
About the Author
A native of San Diego, Rev. Jerry Troyer knows intimately the terrain about which he writes in his new book, Coming Out to Ourselves. He has experienced the process of coming out to himself as a gay man, and then worked through admitting, accepting, and embracing his truth. His life partner’s journey through substance abuse gave Rev. Jerry the opportunity to recognize the horrible impact addiction (of any kind) can have on individuals and families, and ultimately required him to face, forgive and heal his own regret and resentment.
As a result, Rev. Jerry felt the call to invite, encourage and even challenge all people, especially the LGBT community and the recovery community, to look at what they believe about themselves and others, and change what no longer serves them.
Rev. Jerry is senior minister of Joyful Living Church in San Diego, and regularly volunteers at the San Diego LGBT Community Center.
Rev. Jerry and his life partner live in La Mesa, California with their Golden Retriever, Roxie.