WHERE YOUR HAPPINESS HIDES

I fitted into a world that, deep in my heart, I did not want to fit into. By all definitions I was a success: tall, educated, well-credentialed, married (for long periods) with wonderful children, and a financially rich career. But my success came from me achieving what my mind felt I needed to do and be to impress others, and therefore find security in life. My life was one of hard work, an obsession with time, and a focus on being a provider. I had deep disguised insecurities, invisible to those who were following the same path. I was truly in chains, not a world of happiness. My very being was inauthentic and out of step with the true me. I didn’t really want half of the things I managed to attain; I simply got them to impress the rest of the world, but mainly those I loved, because this made me feel more loveable. I did not really like, let alone love myself, which is why I needed to feel loved and important in the eyes of others. Little did I know, along the way, that I was out of alignment with what my heart truly wanted me to be and experience. This, I am still discovering each and every day and it’s truly a great adventure. The last five years of listening has shown me that within my heart lies the wisdom for me to experience love, purpose and a great sense of fulfilment, each and every day regardless of the circumstances. I finally let go of what I thought I was and found my way back to my heart. This is where I am truly at home. To know myself, and not the artificial Mark I thought I was, was possible once I dropped many of my old conditioned beliefs. Some say that this process of self-discovery is painful and brave. To me it was full of wonder, and I would not have missed it for the world, despite the occasional tears. With the wisdom of my heart, but also the wisdom of others who went ahead of me, I have got to the point where I am at peace with myself. I am now what nature intended, but in some ways I am far from normal. I probably don’t fit in to the norm easily any more but that’s alright. I am finding my own herd of like-minded souls and speaking openly about myself whenever the right moments arise. I never want to go back to what I once was, even if that person had admirers, more money, and seemingly fitted in. He was a dull perfectionist with a heavy heart, focussed on surviving not thriving, but he was very, very good at acting out the script written by others. I am actually truly happy now, and loving life every day, even if life is more simplistic and I have no fancy title or fancy home. I have written this book to share my journey of transformation, knowing that it will resonate with some readers, and may help them to find a platform from which to investigate their own lives. Some readers, on understanding my experiences and what I have learned, may have a ‘light bulb’ moment and recognise why they are not totally happy in their lives. They may see themselves following a similar pattern of self-destruction. After all, I think I was a pretty typical person walking through life in a conditioned trance for many years. Perhaps after some self-reflection, these readers will work out what they want out of life and go out and get it! There are many different paths you can take to find your mojo, and there are many people only too willing to help you find yourself. But, remember this: you are the only person who can ever know who you were intended to be or want to become. So, go inward and listen to your gut feelings and your heart, for they are fully versed in the answers, and you are the only person who can hear the music they are playing. Others can advise you, but never know the truth of you. Our own individual worlds and that of our collective societies can shift once we find greater joy and happiness. This shift is exciting to contemplate. Be the change you want to see in the world and watch your outer world change for the better around you. We can all do this, and we must – for the sake of our own happiness and for the sake of the children who will follow us. It’s time we created a natural world, not the so-called normal world we currently endure. The first step is for each and every one of us to become more natural. I hope this book has shown you how critical it is to find the real you, and to express that in this world with no fear. You are here to have fun, be bold and be happy, not to worry or do what the forces of time and obligation impose upon you. You have options to choose from! As I discovered, if you enter the code of happiness into your new operating system (i.e. your heart) and have the bravery to take steps forward, the ingredients for your happiness are waiting to be discovered. Your heart is desperate to tell you who and what you really are so you can transform your life and then the world around you. It’s knocking on your internal doors, waiting for you to listen. I suggest you answer, as you alone have the key. Your heart has always known what makes you happy, so you will truly just be acknowledging what part of you already knows.