Changing the World Through Children

A Necessary Alternative Growing Places starts with nurturing and guiding a child’s spirit. The expansive perception and wisdom that is so instinctive in little children becomes encroached upon through time, by the expectations and judgments of those who enter into a child’s world. We strive to develop the means to accept and protect the wonder of individuality in themselves and others. Through the years we have tweaked and brought our best practices forward to make GP what it has become. An unfortunate by-product of Education today has inadvertently become not to enrich curiosity and love of learning, but to instill worry about how we measure up to what someone else is doing, and fear of failure. In our society, success is all about being the smartest, fastest, most knowledgeable, very best at something- the more and faster, the bigger the better. Progress and advancement can be good; but too much focus on advancing rapidly at a young age usually leads to the neglect of some of the most critical elements in a strong foundation for fulfillment in today’s society. There is so much pressure on children, and us as parents, to live up to the standards of the people around us. Over the years I have watched as more and more is expected of little ones. Where Kindergarten was once a time for play and first grade for learning to read and add, these are more commonly expected of children as young as 3 and 4 years old. There is a compulsion to teach kids more, better, faster, younger so they will have the “highest advantage” in life. I want to laugh and cry when I see educational materials designed to create little geniuses; and when the children can't live up to being the best, most brilliant, most athletic, most fashionable kid on the block, excelling at each thing put before them, then clearly they (or their parents) are a failure; if only in their own minds. Little children have a great deal of critical nurturing that is being overlooked entirely as a result of the current lifestyle in our society. Many more children are attending daycare while both parents must work to make a living. Blended families require children to reconcile two living situations, often with different expectations. The sense of safety in this world has become diminished to the point of not only raising the anxiety of parents, but limiting the freedom of children to explore as we were able to growing up.  Electronic devices have largely replaced the ability to find spiritual satisfaction within, with a desperate search for external gratification from a young age. Little time is set aside for strengthening a sense of individuality and acceptance of self and others. In the scurry of day to day living, we tend to forget that it takes significant time and patience to teach children to understand and cope with the myriad of feelings that wash through us every day; to learn how to communicate effectively with others, and to understand that we each, no matter who we are, have something worthwhile to offer this world. The glorious seedling that is a child’s spirit needs to be protected, and nurtured, and strengthened. Mitigating circumstances can choke this wondrous predisposition through lack of self-confidence, sense of powerlessness, isolation, and continual comparison of oneself to others. Young children need to learn about who they are, and what they are capable of, and how to express themselves in a peaceful manner. They need to learn to accept themselves and others for who they are, and about treating others with dignity and respect. The current focus of early education leaves little opportunity to address these things sufficiently. I have come to believe that the thing that matters most is that children are fully aware of their own inner light, that they are able to call on their inner resources: creativity, courage, contentedness, acceptance, forgiveness, and happiness. We need to teach children at a young age to keep an open mind and heart; to maintain an awareness of their world and their impact on the people around them; to look at their influence in the grand scheme of things.i In order to help kids achieve this, parents need grounding, community support, and resources in raising children with today's rapidly changing and often bewildering expectations. Women in particular, fulfill so many needs of family and community that there is a tendency to lose track of one's self and addressing one's own personal needs. It is difficult to be nurturing when there is a gaping hole in oneself that needs to be nourished. By setting aside time for ourselves, in a very real sense we are able to give parts of our own childhood a do-over. In getting into that mind space, we are able to see things more clearly from our children’s perspective. We start to become aware of the stumbles that were made in our own up-bringing, therefore making it possible to step around the same obstacles as we bring up our own children. If there is to be a more hopeful tomorrow, there needs to be a strong attitudinal shift in the way we bring children up. And if that is to happen, we need to reignite that flame within ourselves as well. We need to mulch and protect life’s garden, and rediscover the beauty within ourselves and each other. This is a mighty task, but it can be done.