G7

Preface In the Beginning In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it. JOHN 1:1–5 NKJV I have read this Scripture many times, and I have heard sermons preached on this verse, but one day the Word of God really resonated with me. Pay close attention to verse five: “And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.” God has been in me from the beginning, in my dark places, but I could not comprehend the excellence of His light that was alive in me. I call this perspective, because we are what we believe. God allows us to come to the revelation of who He is at a pace that’s comfortable for us, but we often extend our suffering because of our denial of who He is in our lives. In this book, I pour out my heart—shameless, transparent, and exposed—because my truth is my testimony, and my triumph is the birthing place for my God-given purpose: my “Triple T Project.” The Internal Battle to Birth This Project God said the time is now. Get your vision, write it, and pursue your purpose, because I am the promise keeper. As I began writing this book, I felt extreme anxiety coupled with procrastination, doubt, and disbelief. I was like a child waiting for my mother’s approval. I started writing this book in 2012, but looking back over my notes and my journals, I was not clear about the direction I should take. I was unsure about the book’s purpose. I had experienced so many obstacles in my life that I felt were book-worthy, but they were consistently inconsistent. My thoughts were all over the place. My book topics ran the gamut from shame to relationships to family issues and so on. After years of praying and seeking God’s direction, God literally gave me the vision for my book in 2016. I thought I was dreaming, but when I woke up, I knew it was a vision. I clearly saw Jesus on the cross. The light emanating behind Him was piercing with hues of sunset-orange, brown, and yellow. I seriously questioned my vision. I tried to understand what I saw. Above Jesus was “G7.” Can you imagine my thoughts? All that came to mind was a G6 airplane. I was like, Okay Lord, You want me to write about a plane? God what does this mean? I also recognized that God usually operates in a supernatural way. I went to work the next day, and I told Denise, my spiritual sister (who I will talk more about in chapter 7), about my vision. She said, “Yes, I know exactly what you saw. Because God showed me in the spirit.” To my amazement, she drew the vision that God had shown me. I realized then the significance of what G7 meant. Denise spoke a word of prophecy over my life in 2006. I did not welcome the word that she gave me at the time. She left our department in 2007, and almost seven years passed before she returned and God used her to pour into me and confirm my spiritual gifts. It wasn’t until then that I would reconcile the past with the present. God was providing direction for me in this season of my life. God said, “Marie your book will have seven chapters, and you will write about seven people that I sent to you for each season of your storms to nurture, guide, and encourage you along the way.” At this point, I was in tears. God let me know in one day that He had prepared everything I needed in seven years, but because of my lack of trust in Him, I delayed my revelation. Can you imagine my feelings at that point? I had always held onto the dream of writing a book; it was near and dear to my heart and God lovingly waited on me until I reached a point of being so uncomfortable that I physically felt a sense of pressure to write my story. I knew my book had to be birthed because it gave purpose to my pain. I knew it could help others who had let their dreams die prematurely due to a lack of vision. I am grateful to God for the manifestation of this book and that it was birthed in life and not buried in death. After my mother had been on hospice care four months, I tried to negotiate with God that yet again the time was not right to write my book. I literally tried to put my life on hold until my mother passed, but she continued to live—another way God was directing me to release the control I thought I had (which I never really did). God was healing me and providing revelation with every word that I wrote in this book. I knew by the time this book was published that my mom would have transitioned to her eternal home with the Lord. While my wounds were fresh and my heart ached, I thank God for the gifts He placed inside of me to be a light in a dark place. Because of God, I forgave my mom for things that she said or did during my life that pierced my heart. But God’s grace was sufficient, and because of His love and mercy, I was able to deny my flesh and lay down the spirit of offense.