Dancers Amongst The Stars

Excerpt from ''Molly''
.......'As she walked along the mossy path through the trees, she noticed a Wise Woman. Just sitting, looking at her. Almost expectantly.

She decided there was nothing to lose. And so she went towards the Wise Woman.

As she came closer, she could feel a strange energy, tingling through her body. In an inexplicable way, she knew it was an energy that she and the Wise Woman shared. She knew they were meant to meet here.

The Wise Woman looked at her and waited for her to speak.

'I want to find happiness,' Molly said. 'I don't know what to do to be happy.'

The Wise Woman said a strange thing. She said, 'My child, what do you need?'

Molly was puzzled, and felt a bit cross. Firstly, the Wise Woman had called her a child. And she wasn't a child. She was a grown up. Couldn't the Wise Woman SEE that?

And also, the Wise Woman had asked her what she needed!! How useless was that!! Didn't she realise she'd come here to understand what to DO, not to be asked what she needed.

The Wise Woman saw her reaction, and just smiled. And waited. Molly realised that she was being invited to say something. So she thought hard, and then she said, 'I need to stop needing so much!'

The Wise Woman considered, head on one side for several moments. Then she asked, ' What is it that you need, my child, that you feel is too much?'

Molly was flabbergasted. She felt like she was being criticised, got at, she felt stupid. Why did the Wise Woman keep asking the same question!? She had given her the answer already. Wasn't she listening!?

And then something clicked. She gasped, like a shock had gone through her. She looked at the Wise Woman, and looked into kindly, knowing eyes.

The Wise Woman smiled and nodded. And waited. Molly looked at her again, then looked away, and then back at her. She saw a depth of knowing in those eyes. Somehow, they gave her courage.

She took a deep breath, and began:

'I need to be loved.' She said, almost in a whisper. She looked at the Wise Woman for approval, but the Wise Woman just smiled, met her gaze, and waited.

'I need to be listened to.......and heard.'...... Again, the waiting, and the encouraging smile.

Suddenly, she knew she could say it all. All of it. All the needing and the wanting, the longings she'd kept in for so long:

'I need to say what I'm feeling....I need to be allowed to feel what I feel......I need to not feel guilty......or ashamed......or bad. I need to know I'm okay. Just as I am. To love ME.'

The words were starting to tumble out now. 'I need to laugh out loud...to be noisy.......to enjoy myself.......to say yes......to say no.......to choose.....'

The Wise Woman still met her eyes. Molly stopped and felt the connection. It was so profound it took her breath away. Then she spoke, very quietly, almost lovingly. The compassion in her voice was so soothing, such a relief, like balm on a sore wound.

'My child, you have ALWAYS needed to do those things. They were always yours. To experience them was the reason you came. But you had forgotten, and now you have remembered.'

'When we fall into a place of forgetting, we forget our joy, our power, our magnificence, our freedom. And in its place, we learn shame. You have learned to feel ashamed for being you, my child. You must forgive yourself.

Again, the surprise at what the Wise Woman had said. Molly thought and thought, but could not understand. 'I don't understand,' she said.

The Wise Woman nodded. It was clear that she didn't need any further explanation. That she knew what Molly meant.

'When we forget who we are, and why we came here, we start to believe we have got things badly wrong, have done things that make us bad. We feel terrible shame. We stop being able to be ourselves, still less to love ourselves. Instead, there is only shame. '

'You have to forgive yourself for forgetting, my child. For allowing shame to take over....'

Storm
I cried out in the
middle of the storm:
I cannot do this,
it is too much,
do not ask it.
And the voice whispered:
This too shall pass.
Let it be.
All is as it should be.
All is well.

I cried out as the rain
lashed and drenched
and chilled me
to the bone:
I am not strong enough,
I cannot withstand it,
this will wash me away,
I will drown in it.
And the voice whispered:
You are strong,
you are powerful,
stand firm and it will
wash over you.
This too shall pass.
Let go, let be.
All is as it should be.
All is well.

I gasped as the wind
took my breath away,
tearing and swirling and raging,
almost knocking me over.
Struggling to stay
on my feet,
I cried out in fear:
I need this to stop
I cannot hold on
I must let go soon.
And the voice whispered,
Your roots are deeper
than you think,
and you are far wiser
than you think.
Bend and turn and let go.
This too shall pass.
Let this flow and move through you.
All is exactly as it needs to be.
All is well.

I cried more tears
than I knew I had inside me,
and sobbed more protests
than I knew were in me.
I became the storm,
I became the rain,
raged with the wind itself.
I gave myself up,
I let go and became one
with each moment,
as the storm whipped
into a frenzy.
I held on and held on,
as I shook and bent and turned
and broke and yielded.
And let go.......
And let go.........

And finally,
finally, finally.......
at long last
the storm began to ease,
the sky became kinder,
the rain fell more gently.
The wind became a breeze,
warm and gentle
tender and soothing
and I remembered
all the voice had whispered.
And I knew
that I was not only the storm,
and the rain and the wind,
but the voice also.
I knew that the voice
was mine,
and yet not mine alone
but our voices,
countless voices.
All of us.
One voice.

I knew that where I had been
we all had been,
where I was, we all were.
And that where I now stood
we were all now standing.
I remembered this voice
down the ages, beyond and beneath and in all.
And I let go.
And let be.
And let be.