1st Business Shift: How We Define Our Self and Our Core Values
How do you define yourself? Have you given it much thought? If you do not know who you are, how can you expect anyone else to? How can you lead a company or build teamwork if you do not know what your core values/principles are or what you stand for? These core values are consistent and come from the heart (your ‘True Essence’) rather than the head (ego-based).
Our ego is trained and shaped by our society, media, parents, teachers, educational institutions, religious figures, work experiences and culture in general to identify with a perception of self and reality that has been created for us. Increasingly over time we actually see this reality to be true and accept it as our own.
It is important to get in touch with who you truly are- your ‘WHY” as we talked about above- rather than define yourself by your teachers’, boss’, coach’s, or parental goals, labels or values. You should be a walking billboard of your core values rather than someone else’s. You should be able to convey your core values to your staff, colleagues and customers. If you are not connected with your ‘True Essence’ or core values, then you can lead a life where you feel unfulfilled, lost or with lack of purpose. In short, if you are not connected to your ‘True Essence’, you will likely walk around feeling either numb, ‘pissed’ or ‘dissed’.
Exercises to Connect with Your True Essence, Your Core Values, Your ‘Why’:
1. Connect with Your Core Values by writing out a list of 30 things you want to do with your life, 30 things you would like to have in your life, and a ‘bucket list’ of 30 things you would like to do before you die. You will find that your answers will likely start out just superficially scratching the surface of your ego-based values, but by having to dig deeper as your list lengthens you will begin to get closer to what is really resonating with your True Essence’s core values. If you want to take this exercise to a more profound level, do it with a good friend or partner. Sit across from them and have them look deeply into your eyes as they ask you “What do you really want?” over and over until you truly get to the core root of each desire or want such as “I want to be loved” or “I want to make a real difference”, etc rather than “I want the big office on the lake”.
2. Connect with Who You Really Are (Your True Essence) through a guided meditation exercise on the Shift – CD1 Guided Meditations by Tracy Latz & Marion Ross (‘The Obstacle of How We Define Our Self’ track at https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/shift-12-keys-to-shift-your/id499704153
Close your eyes and take three slow, deep breaths. With each breath, breathe in gold and white light and feel that light entering into your lungs, traveling into your bloodstream and from there journeying to every cell, atom and molecule in your body. As you exhale, feel yourself releasing any negativity that is within you until eventually you are completely filled with light and exhaling light out into the room. Sense the room filling with light.
See or sense yourself standing outdoors in a peaceful place that you know well. Feel the warmth of the sun on your face. Immerse yourself in the sights, sounds and scents of this serene place in nature. Up ahead is a beautiful path of light. Feel yourself stepping onto this path of light and feel yourself being lifted higher and lighter, lighter and freer, freer and lighter, gently spiraling upward until you find yourself arriving at a gateway. This is the entryway to your personal paradise, the garden of your true essence.
Continue on this path of light, passing through the gate and notice a wondrous abundant garden filled with tranquility, peace and love. Be aware of all the beauty. As you continue to follow the path, it winds around a turn that you cannot yet see beyond. You wonder what is ahead.
Continue to follow the path and as you round the turn you are awed at the panoramic scene that stands before you. There is a vast and breathtaking sea extending out into the horizon. It draws you to the water’s edge. Feel the healing ocean breeze as it caresses you. Breathe in the healing gentle wind and feel yourself completely relaxing.
Now call your name three times silently from the center of your heart, beckoning to your true essence to come forward. Watch as your true self appears in the distance on the beach and slowly walks towards you. Your true essence appears to you in its most enlightened human form.
Observe the feet of your true self as he or she stands before you. Notice every detail as you slowly lift your gaze upward until eventually you are looking directly into the eyes of your own true essence. Feel the beauty of your true essence and become aware of the qualities that make your true self who they are. You are gazing into your own soul, the essence of who you truly are.
Feel your true self place their hands of light upon your heart. Feel your own true essence reawakening your qualities and innate gifts that may have been long forgotten. Sense those abilities and qualities flowing into you and feel the completeness as you recognize and remember who you really are.
Look deep into the eyes of your true self and feel their absolute acceptance and unconditional love for you, exactly as you are right now. Your true self puts their arms around you and gently holds you. Feel yourself letting go completely in the arms of your true self. Now feel your true essence merge with you. Feel the oneness. Feel the power. Feel the healing that comes with the unity.
When you feel that you are ready to return to your physical world, feel yourself stepping once again onto the path of light, taking with you all of your reawakened gifts and abilities so that you may express them in your life and in the world. Place your hand on your heart and feel your love and strength, knowing that there is nothing that you cannot accomplish. When you feel yourself fully present, take a deep breath, and gently open your eyes.
Connect With Your ‘Why’ Exercise:
Make a list of every situation you can recall that make you feel “Pissed” (righteously indignant) or “Dissed” (cursed or wounded). What are the common threads in the situations that upset you so much? This will assist you to get into touch with why you are doing things in the manner that you do rather than how it was done to you. What would you like to correct in the world or others people?
Now make a list of all the situations in which you felt “Blissed (where your heart sang) or “Blessed” (people who believed in you or told you that you had gifts and abilities you should share). This will help you get in touch with what you love, what truly touches your heart and what gifts you have to share in the world.