Art of Well-being

“You still didn’t tell us what stress means.” Neil’s wife, Karen said.
“My next task is that. Stress is a word originally used in the field of engineering. Definition of stress in engineering terms is ‘a force or system of forces which tends to produce deformation in a body on which it acts or influences’. This definition has a very close relationship with the stress that we are experiencing every day. We’ll be bombarded with outside stimuli every day. They come as forces of different natures. If we have the strength to withstand them physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually those forces cannot harm us or deform us as per the previous definition. So experiencing a stressful situation is totally dependent upon our physical and mental strength. ‘Art of Well-being’ is the process that helps us to keep physical and mental strength at the highest level.” I said.
Brian applauded. “Great, Nal, you cleared up a big confusion which has haunted my mind for several years. Now I know that I can take control of my stress. But I can’t control the forces which create stress.”
“Now let’s go through the physical and mental processes behind ‘stress’. According to research scientists, when we encounter a challenging or threatening situation, a part of our involuntary nervous system becomes instantly and automatically activated. This triggers and raises our blood pressure and heart rate and stimulates the adrenal glands to release adrenaline.
This is called the ‘fight or flight’ response by our physiological system. This response was very helpful in the early days for our ancestors in order to survive in threatening situations. If a dangerous animal was about to eat you, the only way to survive was either fight back or run away. Our ability to respond quickly to a threat helped us survive in dangerous situations. Even today this response is occasionally useful. However the fight or flight response can create health issues for most of us today.
You may activate the fight or flight response when you are stuck in rush-hour-traffic or facing a critical work deadline, but neither fighting nor running away is a viable option. Research scientist, Hans Selye found that the fight or flight response causes changes in the nervous system and the hormonal system. According to Ayurveda the short term consequence of an activated flight or fight response is stress. The long-term consequence of the flight or fight response is chronic fatigue, aging, hypertension, heart disease, stomach ulcers, autoimmune disease, cancer, anxiety and insomnia.” I said.
Brian seems to be very impatient. “Agreed, Nal. Now tell us how to overcome this situation.”
“Brian, you used the right word. I’m happy about it. We must ‘overcome’ stress. Not ‘manage’ it. When you are trying to manage something, you are still living with it. If you are living with stress, it is very dangerous.” I said.
“You made me frightened, Nal, now I know why my Doctor couldn’t find what my problem is. I have stomach ulcers and high blood pressure. I can’t sleep without sleeping pills. From the time I wake up in the morning, I’m moving on the double. Every day I’ve to solve employee issues, share-holder’s problems, customer complaints, political pressure and many other problems. I’m always stressed. Are you going to tell me how to solve all these problems?” Jason asked.

“Nal, I have a question. I hope I won’t take you away from the topic. How do you explain intimate relationships under “Right Relationships”? How important are they for vigor and vitality? What is the role of sexual relationships in creating well-being?” Sharon asked.
“Great questions, Sharon. I’m happy you asked these questions. The answers are very important for everybody and especially for people like us who are approaching or passing the middle age of life.” I said.
All were listening curiously.
“According to Ayurveda, sexual energy is the creative energy of the world and all living beings arise from sexual energy. In human beings the characteristics such as passion, creativity, attraction, enthusiasm, excitement, arousal and inspiration are generated by sexual energy. So the short answer to your question is this. For adults, intimate relationships are an essential component in ‘Right Relationships’ and they are playing a major role in your vitality and well-being. ‘Sexual relationship’ is the process to create effective intimate relationships. But for most people ‘sex’ is an event or a goal. But in order to gain it’s benefits, it has to be a process. We are living in a ‘goal’ oriented society. When there is a ‘goal’ in our mind, we work hard to achieve it as quickly and efficiently as possible. If we treat ‘sexual relationship’ as a goal, then the climax or orgasm is our ultimate target. This will not allow us to create and maintain an effective intimate relationship. But when we treat ‘sexual relationships’ as a process, we will naturally be setting our minds to extend the process and time of love-making. According to ancient wisdom, playing with sexual energy and extending the process of lovemaking expands the efficiency of our neuro-physiological and neuro-psychological systems.” I answered.
“Great insight, Nal. Is there an age barrier for this?” Neil asked.
“No, according to ancient texts as well as recent research studies, sexual energy is available to us at all ages. Studies have also shown that a majority of both men and women are sexually active through their sixties, seventies and even eighties.” I said.