Feel Awesome Everyday

Fear-The Real F Word I grew up in Virginia and we had a beach house in Nag’s Head, North Carolina where we used to go for a couple weeks in the summer and usually some other weekends here and there throughout the year. Then, I went to college in southern Virginia and moved to Virginia Beach after graduation and spent many days at the beach there. From Virginia Beach, I moved to San Diego and have lived here for the last sixteen years. So, basically, you can say I’m a beach girl. I love the beach and I absolutely love surfing. I’ve surfed on a few different continents in several countries and I go as much as I can here in San Diego. I didn’t always surf, though. When we were younger, we used to boogie board (which if you haven’t tried it, is one of the most fun activities you can ever do). Then my parents bought kayaks and we’d take them out into the ocean and paddle around. And, of course, I’ve always liked to splash around in the waves too, just hanging out or floating on a raft or whatever. To me, being in the ocean is one of the best feelings in the world. I love the salty water, the way you can move around in the water. I love snorkeling and seeing all the fish and seaweed and rocks in the water. I love sitting on my surfboard waiting for another set to role in rolling up and down over the smaller waves as they pass by. I love riding the waves on my board. Feeling the rush of the wave and the energy of the ocean propel me along the wave, closer to shore. I also love wiping out or just jumping off my board, or boat, or cliff, or whatever I can, plunging into the water, surrounding myself with that cool, fresh, salty, crisp sting all over my skin. The bottom line is that I love being in the ocean and I probably won’t ever stop loving being in the ocean. There is a constant that I’ve noticed when in the ocean (and a point to all this as well), as well as, a question that I get asked all the time when I tell people I surf and how much I love the ocean, which is “Aren’t you scared of sharks?” My answer to this question (and part of my point) is “Well, no, I’m not afraid of sharks. But, you can freak yourself out about anything, so I’ve definitely been scared in the water.” There have been about 8,756 times that I’ve been in the water, where I look down and see the shadow of my surfboard (or kayak or boogie board) and think it’s Jaws coming to attack me. I am literally scared of my own shadow. Of course, after a second or two I realize it’s only my board, and I’m fine, for the most part, but then the idea of that shark is still sort of stuck in the back of my mind. If I let myself freak out every time I look down and see a seven foot shadow that resembles a prehistoric predator, or think to myself, “What if something happened right now?” I would never get back into the water. Half the time I surf, I go by myself, so I don’t always have a buddy to talk me out of this. If I let my fear get the best of me, I’d be agoraphobic. I’d never leave the house. And that is entirely possible. It happens all the time. I can freak myself out about anything really. If I’m just walking my dogs, I can freak myself out if I think about any serial killer I’ve ever heard of. If I thought about all the car accidents that happen on a daily basis, would I ever want to drive my car? Probably not. My point is, fear is always there, no matter what. There is always going to be something to be scared of and it’s going to follow you wherever you go throughout your life, whatever you do, or whichever endeavor you choose to seek out if you let it. The difference is what you choose to do with this fear. It is your own fear, in your own head. You can think of all the different scenarios that could happen. Or all the things that could go wrong. And, you could let the fear of these scenarios paralyze you and stop you from ever trying anything new or ever taking a risk. But you also have the choice as to whether you’re going to LET the fear paralyze or stop you. Furthermore, have you ever noticed how much people love giving their two cents? They love to share their opinion with you and they may project their own fears onto you, by saying “I’d never go surfing, I’m too scared of sharks,” or “I’d never start my own business, I’m too scared of failing,” or “I’d never try to be the next American Idol, I’m too scared my voice would crack.” Does that mean that you’re going to get attacked by a shark or that your business is going to fail or that your voice will crack in front of Simon Cowell? Maybe, but you’re going to do it anyway, because you will never know how high you can fly, if you’re too scared to take a leap. There’s a saying that I heard a long time ago that goes something like “Courage is not having no fear at all. Courage is having the fear and doing it anyway.” This has always stuck with me and I’ve repeated it over and over and over in my head when the fear sets in “Why are YOU writing a book? You’re not a writer. No one will ever read it.” “You’re making skin care? Why? How? Do you even know what you’re doing?” “Why are you posting this? People don’t care what you have to say.” These are all things I’ve said to myself yet I do this stuff anyway because I love what I do and I love helping people. The fear that I feel when I see my own shadow, or when I walk into the publisher’s office with my book doesn’t outweigh the joy and excitement and all the good feelings I feel when I’m doing the things I love or doing something that’s going to bring me success or help someone feel better. This is why we do the things we love and this is why we continue to push forward and take risks to make ourselves and our lives better. Think about how great you feel when you do something that you love, whether it’s surfing or snowboarding or finishing a marathon or getting a promotion, whatever it is, think about that wonderful feeling of accomplishment and that adrenalin rush. And, next time you feel that fear setting in, or someone tries to pull you down with their negativity, instead of thinking of all the things that could go wrong, think of all the stuff that will go right! What if you ride the most amazing wave you’ve ever caught? What if you start a business and it becomes a massive success? What if you do become the next American Idol (is that even a thing anymore?)? The point is, don’t let the fear overtake you! Get out there! Don’t be scared of your own shadow, like me! Do it anyway! Go for it because you got this!