Electric Boogie: How Energy Affects Fertility
“And what is man without energy? Nothing—nothing at all.”
When we talk about fertility, we are addressing an energetic system that begets life. But what would life be like without energy? Would the sun exist? How about flowers, trees and the food we eat? What about humans? If there were no energy, what would become of us?
It might feel strange to think this way about your body and mind. It was completely foreign to me for many years. By the time I went to college, I was fascinated by the mind-body connection. My life was like a puzzle with pieces strewn all over the place. Working with therapists, I started putting some of the pieces together and learning why my body and mind worked the way they did. However, it always felt like something was missing.
It was not until I learned about energy and how it affected the totality of my being that I really started seeing the pieces fall into place. It was like I had finally found the dimmer switch to a light bulb and turned it way up, which allowed me to see more of the puzzle. I was then able to more fully influence how I refined my thinking, my physical body and my entire life; I put the pieces back together to make myself whole, which is the opportunity I present to you in this book.
After all, you would only want to give your child all of you, not just a part. Infertility is not so much a “problem” as it is a chance for you to refine many aspects of yourself, so that you can be whole. Here is your chance to do so.
Wherever you are in your life, I invite you to see infertility as a perfectly natural and normal process. You have not done anything wrong. Wholeness is your birthright. You now have the opportunity to start loving yourself completely so that, if and when you become pregnant, you can pass on this vital life skill to your child. To love ourselves is perhaps the only way we will ever become complete. The key is this: by remaining neutral in the process—letting go of the outcome of bearing a child and shifting our intention to becoming whole—we can create miracles.
What is the Energetic Fertility Method (EFM)?
First, EFM is not a miracle worker. The only channel through which such a miracle can occur is you—this book will help place you in the driver's seat. The primary intention of the methodology I introduce is to facilitate your own power. Having said that, the Energetic Fertility Method is based on the premise that everything is energy—your physical body, your thoughts, other peoples’ bodies and ideas, the trees you see outside, the birds that chirp, the cup of tea in your hands and the electronics you use. Without energy, nothing would exist. The good news is you can harness that energy. You can direct it, and I am going to teach you how to do so, bringing you into wholeness for yourself and for your future child.
Very often energy gets stuck, becomes stagnant or leaves an energetic residue, which can affect fertility. Think about how a dam works. Imagine that the water is like the energy in your body and the dam represents things that cause that energy to become stuck. A dam must have a gate and a way to remove everything that contributes to the block, thus allowing the water to flow into the spillway. EFM is similar to the gate in a dam; it helps you address the stagnant energy to get it moving. In order to bring in a baby, you want and need your energy to flow optimally—for yourself and the new life you are creating.
What causes energy to stagnate? In my practice I have seen many issues that contribute to this: unresolved grief or anger regarding a past miscarriage or pregnancy termination; childhood trauma; unsettled issues with a parent or grandparent; the loss of a loved one; our own and others’ expectations, frustrations and judgments of what the journey towards motherhood ought to look like; fears around getting pregnant, being a parent, and the responsibilities that this entails. Throughout this book you will learn more about what types of things can end up being energetic baggage and can create blocks to pregnancy. Some of these you might be aware of while others will be a surprise.
Have you ever considered that what happened to you in utero could affect your ability to have your own baby? What about how you relate to your body? Do you treat your body like a best friend, an acquaintance or a nemesis? Have you considered that your past intimate relationships could affect your ability to have a child? When we are intimate with others, we share energy. If we do not move this energy out of our space, it stays put and can hinder our child-making abilities.
But how do we know where our own energy begins and ends?