In life, it is important to recognize what you don’t want to experience. Envision the world you want to live in with every fiber of your body. Define that relationship you want with people in your life. What does it look like? What does it feel like? Defining your “needs and wants” will bring you closer to the reality you seek. The reality you and every civilized human wants to live – a world filled with compassion, understanding, kindness and forgiveness. A world free of criticism, judgment, intolerance, control, violence, sexual harassment, bullying and any form of abuse.
This book is meant to help you avoid the common thread that has brought so many people (mostly women) together. The needle that has punctured us, leaving wounds in the heart and deeply in the psyche. While the undercurrent message concerns “abuse” – it is not another sad story to make anyone feel like a victim. Instead, this book is meant to talk about being a “survivor” each day. Not just a survivor because you may have escaped abuse and are lucky enough to tell the tale. No! You are a survivor each day because you don’t allow abuse to enter your life in any form. You are a survivor because you are wise enough to recognize it; strong enough to push it away; and resilient enough to keep it from entering your existence.
If you have this book in your hands and feel sad as you read my story recalling perhaps your own experiences involving abusive behavior, I want you to put this book down, stand up tall – look up to the universe and say out loud – “I am protected, I am loved, and I am a survivor”.
Let this become your new “Mantra”. (A Mantra is the short version of the Pahlavi word "Mahantra" meaning protection, its origin from the Kurdish word "Pala" meaning to take refuge under.) Protection is powerful! It is the only thing you can do for yourself – no one else will love you or protect you better than you.
There are insights I will challenge you to discover. It may get personal and make you uncomfortable. Pushing to the edge and delving deep inside is the only way you will face your truth. I want you to peel the layers apart one by one. With each layer, you will shed the pain, feel hurt, have feelings of unworthiness and shame and even guilt. You may also cry as I did many times while writing and rereading my story. Let go as you dig deep inside right next to me. I want to leave you with the “core” of who you are so that you can discover the person you are meant to be:
A person of strength & self-confidence. A person of value who recognizes abusive behavior, stands up tall, and faces it dead on with one message: Enough!